Monday, 21 August 2017


Over the last few years I haven't done a lot to celebrate my birthday, I didn't feel the need to plan or organise anything because it's just another day. This year was very different, not only did I spend a weekend in Brighton I decided to go to Palma for five days. Originally I was going solo but two friends jumped on my band wagon and decided to go with me, I was thrilled to have two beautiful girlies to help me celebrate my birthday in style.

The purpose of this holiday was to relax, unwind and enjoy exploring a new place. I'm happy the girls decided not to get drunk every night as I don't think I would have enjoyed the holiday as much if I was holding their hair back while they threw up. I'm greatful they decided to take it easy considering I don't drink alcohol.

On the 25th July we celebrated me turning 25 years old. Yikes, its strange to write that down. I can't believe I'm a quarter of a century old! We ate at a gorgeous restaurant on the seafront, listening to the waves crash against the rocks was magical. It's so soothing. Jayde bless her paid for it which was a very generous birthday surprise.


We stayed at the TRYP Bellver Hotel in Palma, it's the nicest place I've stayed and made our trip perfect. The entire hotel was beautifully decorated, our room was completely white with wooden elements. The best part of the room was definitely the beds, the last time I slept in a bed that comfortable is when I stayed at the Virgin Hotel in Chicago. The pillows are unbelievable, I didn't want to get out of bed.

The staff were polite and very helpful, the language barrier was sometimes difficult but we got by. I'm going to make it my mission to learn the basic language skills for my next trip as it would be beneficial.

I would recommend this hotel if you're heading to Palma. It's reasonably priced, we paid £244 for 4 nights each. Normally I would stay in cheaper accommodation when travelling but this was a special occasion and we all needed a bit of luxury in our lives. When I travel solo I would opt for a hostel as it's cheap and cheerful, although we wanted to enjoy our stay and spend time at the hotel. I was having the time of my life relaxing and eating amazing food that I didn't take loads of photos of the hotel. Sorry guys, you'll just have to experience it for yourself.


The best thing about staying in a 4 star hotel is having a balcony. Ours overlooked the pier and what a spectacular view it was. What I wouldn't give to be having breakfast on the balcony watching the world go by right about now.

There is nothing I enjoy more than taking a stroll with beautiful scenery, it was great to wander along the pier. Naturally when there is a stunning backdrop I can't help but take photos, the sunset was particularly amazing to photograph. During the day it was still very picturesque, we were physically jumping for joy! The expression on my face is hilarious! 

I also got the chance to practice some yoga, love a good headstand. Emma and Jayde were like worried parents telling their child not to do something, but I did it anyways. Don't worry guys, I got this! 


After sleeping in the amazing beds we woke up fresh faced and fabulous, we thought the beach would be the best place to get our tan on! Being in Spain there are plenty of beaches to choose from, although since we were only there for 5 days we didn't get a chance to visit many of them. In fact we only went to one because we spent the majority of our time tanning by the pool. Palma City Beach was a short 15 minute walk from our hotel, the staff mentioned it wasn't the best beach compared to others that are slightly further away but it was perfect for what we needed.

I expected to be able to hire a sunbed as most beaches love to make some extra cash from tourist. Unfortunately this wasn't the case and we had to tan ourselves on the sand. I think we had been spoilt with staying at a nice hotel that we forgot how to be like normal folk. 

We were so fortunate with the weather, clear blue skies and the sun felt lush, the perfect tanning day. After a little while Em started to feel too hot, she was a little red and needed suncream and shade. Luckily she didn't get sunstroke! A little lesson to always apply suncream everywhere and stay hydrated! I felt like a parent on this trip always telling the girls to apply suncream hehe.

We headed over to the beach cafe to shade ourselves, it was a little classy for a beach cafe, more like a membership club. You needed to purchase a drink or some nibbles to sit down but this wasn't a problem. There were sunbeds available and we did consider renting one until the staff told us it was €35! That's right, €35 for the sunbed and you didn't get anything additional included. What a rip off! After we finished drinks we headed back to the hotel to use the free sunbeds.


One day the weather wasn't the best, a little cloudy so we decided to head into town and take a look around. There are loads of back streets and its very easy to get lost, but sometimes its great to wander, not think about the time of day or where you are.

There were standard tourist shops, chains and restaurants. If you go deeper into the city you find little cafes and restaurants that sell real Spanish food. We had Tapas, the girls had sangria and said it was strong but delicious, I took their word for it. The food itself was incredible, so many yummy flavours. We ordered Patas Bravas and the waitress said "you do know this is a very hot dish?", like english people can't handle spicy food haha!


In-between tanning and relaxation we managed to do some sight seeing, one thing on my to do list while in Palma was to see the Cathedral. It's breath taking, the architecture is incredible and its the most beautiful building I have ever seen, along side the Sagrada Familia in Barcelona. We didn't go inside but I'm sure it's just as stunning.

Birthday celebrations are going to be tough to top next year, what am I going to do? Perhaps I should look into a trip to America or Japan, they've always been on my travel wishlist. One thing I can say about this year is it wouldn't have been the same without my amazing friends and family helping me celebrate in style. I truly am surrounded by the best people anyone could ask for.

Sincerely, Kimberly.

Wednesday, 26 July 2017


For a few months I was dropping not so subtle hints to my sister Charlotte that I would love to visit Brighton for my birthday, I’ve seen photos of the pier that look incredible and heard nothing but positive things. Charlotte normally goes on 10 holidays a year, sometimes it's hard to pin her down so I was amazingly happy when she said yes! Since she's currently living in London for work we don't get any quality time together, it was the perfect opportunity. We booked everything in June and I was incredibly excited for the upcoming trip in July.

The day we were travelling it started off with a little bump in the road, our 9:04 train was cancelled. Luckily trains to Brighton are frequent from London, we managed to catch the next one at 9:40. That means I lost a whole 36 minutes of my time in Brighton, that’s right 36 minutes! I hope you’re as outranged as I was...

We arrived safely and decided to walk to the B&B, it was only 20 minutes from the train station so wasn't far at all. We stayed at the Instanbul ev guest house, our room was on the top floor but this didn't bother us, perhaps the exercise was needed with all the ice-cream I intended to consume. The room was a decent size with two single beds, I much prefer single beds when travelling with friends in the summer. It can get hot and humid so I need my personal space in these situations. Luckily our room wasn't too bad heat wise. 

I always find it's best to get breakfast included in your accommodation where possible so you're not searching for the right place to eat. There was a choice between a full English or continental. I'm not much of a fan of full English so I went for poached eggs on toast with mushrooms and beans, it was great! 

Would I recommend this B&B? I'm going to say yes. The staff are polite and happy to help, the room rates were reasonable for the seafront, we paid £117 each for two nights. The only thing I would say is they need to upgrade parts of the B&B, but that wouldn't stop me from going back. 

I must warn you if you're staying near the seafront you'll wake up to a "lovely" squawking sound at 5am, it's definitely a wake up call! The seagulls are singing from the crack of dawn. On several occasions Charlotte threatened to shoot them, at first I thought this was a little aggressive but they don’t shut up! Another great fact about these birds is if you’re on the beach/pier and have Fish and Chips, they will stalk you, if they came after me I would sacrifice the food and make a run for it! 

Brighton pier
After we dumped the suitcases we headed straight out to explore, our B&B was situated right on the pier, only a two minute walk away. We explored Brighton pier for the majority of the day, looking around the rides, shops and walking along the beach. It wasn't busy at all, perhaps it's because it was a Friday but we were greatful we could get some great photos. Brighton pier is full of restaurants and take away places, we opted for chips, I don't normally like "chip shop" chips because they tend to be greasy but these weren't and were delicious! That good we had them again!

At night the old and new pier is just as pretty and photogenic.

We carried on walking down the beach and reached the colourful huts, I was expecting them to be on the beach not the pavement but they still looked bright and beautiful. The fact they were on the pavement didn't stop me from taking about 100 photos, Charlotte should of been paid as my photographer that day! Apparently you can buy the huts, inside you can decorate and make adjustments to the space to suit your needs, some people had a bed in them, others only bits and bobs for the beach. We asked a guy to take a photo of us and he mentioned that they're extremely expensive, I haven't looked it up but I'll take his word for it. Most people who own them tend to be retired so are able to spend time enjoying them to get the most out of their investment. 

After 6 hours of walking along the pier and exploring we decided to head back to the B&B. Since we were walking all day we didn't realise how far along the beach we actually went. About 30-40 minutes, I didn't mind the walk as it was such a nice day. Plus we stopped for ice cream on route back, chocolate brownie and cookies & cream how could you not love that! Back at the B&B we realised how burnt we both were, apparently to prevent sunburn you need to apply suncream ...  who knew! I didn't make the best outfit choice for the day, I wore a cold shoulder top which meant I now have red circles on my shoulders and white arms, not the look I was wanting to style this summer. Oops! Even though we were burnt and possibly suffering from sunstroke we had high exceptions for the evening and were going to watch the sunset at 9pm. After 6 hours of walking along the pier we were a tad tired and took a nap, waking up to our alarm at 8pm, ignoring this and going back to sleep until 10pm. I can safely say that we missed the sunset. We attempted to watch it the following night, although it wasn't the best weather and was very cloudy so unfortunately the sunset wasn't that great. Just a missed opportunity, I'll catch it next time! 

For my birthday Charlotte booked for us to go on the i360 which is a little like a sky bar. You get on the platform and it slowly takes you up. The views were amazing, we could see all of Brighton and we chose the best day as it was blue skies. I can't imagine it would be as impressive if it was a dull and cloudy day. 

Anyone who knows me understands that I have an obsessive need to take photos, although it wasn't really possible to capture the moment properly as the reflection on the glass creates a glare. I guess these kind of experiences are meant for enjoying the moment rather than capturing it on a camera. This experience is only for 30 minutes and you have to book in for a time slot. I could of stayed longer if I had a choice because it's such an amazing view. Looking down at the city I realised that Brighton is quite a quirky place, I've heard of all the street art and it continues to the roofs of the buildings, how awesome is that?! 

An interesting fact that I found out is this attraction replaced the big wheel, it was taken down in May this year in order to get the planning permission for the i360. I do love a big wheel but wasn't disappointed by the amazing view at the top of the i360. I would definitely recommend it if you visit Brighton.

Royal Pavillion
For more of the arty museum goers visiting the Royal Pavillion should definitely be on your list of things to do in Brighton. We didn't end up going inside the building but the building itself certainly made an impression, the architecture is beautiful!

Brighton City centre
It was disappointing when the weather took a turn for the worst on the second day, it was very cloudy and over cast, there was a small beacon of hope with the sunlight despretely trying to peak through the clouds but it was not meant to be. In the afternoon there was heavy rain so we decided that the best thing to do was to stay indoors where possible. Despite the crappy weather it didn't ruin our day. We took the opportunity to do a little bit of shopping, since Charlotte has been working 60 hours on average a week at work she needed some TLC and a shopping trip was the best thing. I'm not going to lie I also brought a few bits and bobs, I never really get the chance to browse the shops as I'm always going because I need something like leggings for example so was nice to relax while treating myself. It was my birthday weekend after all

As we were wondering through the streets we came across the greatest shop I have ever seen! The Duck House, it's an entire shop dedicated to rubber ducks. The range is huge, looking on their FB page they sell over 900 different ones across each store location. Naturally I couldn't resist and got one for my niece Phoebe and another for my friends baby Thea. It was super busy and I can see why, although this meant I didn't get any good photos, you'll have to go and experience it for yourself.

Since we missed the sunset on the first evening, Charlotte thought it would be an awesome idea to watch the sunrise on our last day in Brighton. The alarm went off at 4:45am and Charlotte wouldn't get out of bed and continued snoozing. Despite this I decided to go out and take a look for myself, it was definitely worth it.

My experience in Brighton has been awesome, I got to catch up with one of my favourite people in the world and explore a new place. If you're looking for a weekend away I would suggest giving Brighton a chance. We were there for three days and I think that's enough for what is there to see. Thanks so much to my amazing sister Charlotte for celebrating my 25th Birthday with me!!

Sincerely, Kimberly.

Sunday, 9 July 2017


I have days where my self-confidence is booming, but sometimes things don't go to plan and my confidence is nowhere to be found. Recently, I've had my confidence knocked, on top of my anxiety playing up a little. Instead of cheering myself up, I've spent time wallowing in self pity and criticising myself for not reaching my incredibly high standards. I've been known for being too hard on myself, self-confidence is something I've always struggled with, it's challenging. Somedays I don't feel the need to get out of bed, my hair is coated in dry shampoo and I hide under the duvet hoping my problems will disappear. Do other people feel the same way? As if it's impossible to build yourself up as you're too busy knocking yourself down ... After all, we're our own worst critics.

After I spoke with a friend I realised that I shouldn't worry so much, I was told I should have a "don't give a fuck day". This is a great way to think about life, if your expectations are very low or non-existent then you won't be disappointed if something doesn't work out. The other day I actually gave this a try and it was the best thing ever! I took a deep breathe and just thought who cares, the world isn't going to end if I don't get everything done.

After years of my emotions and mental health being up and down I've picked up a few helpful tips to boost my happiness and confidence levels even when times are tough...

Do what you love
A nice and easy way to boost your confidence and happiness levels is to do what you love. I've never felt so confident as I do when I'm pole dancing, I feel so empowered and strong. Think about an activity or something that makes you feel like you're on top of the world and just do it. Whether it's something small like applying makeup and doing your hair fancy, or going on a big day out with friends, do something that will cheer you up.

Get ready
I know how tempting it is to hide under the duvet and chain watch Netflix all day, find the courage to say no! Drag yourself out of bed and get dressed, even if you're chilling around the house. I find I'm much more productive if I've had a shower and freshened up, it helps me feel like I'm ready to take on the challenges of the day ahead. Somedays I even go all out and wear perfume, I know I'm a rebel. It's always sods law that if you go out, even quickly nipping to the shops looking like "crap" you're bound to walk into someone you know. It's happened to me in the past and I've felt even worse after that encounter, put a little effort in and these things won't affect you. You may even get a compliment that improves your self-confidence.

Make a list
I love to make lists, it feels so good to tick something off, does anyone else feel like this? If you have a super busy day try making a list of tasks you need to complete. Ticking them off as the day goes on, this will ensure you're extremely productive and you'll feel proud of everything you've managed to accomplish. Although, don't worry if your list isn't very long, anything is great to achieve. Somedays I don't write a physical list I simply take a mental note "Today I will watch Netflix and eat some Ben & Jerry's", because I get so excited about lists I have to pencil time in the relax. Am I the life of the party or what!

Eat food
A little but of what you fancy does you good, if you're feeling blue and need some chocolate then eat some, if you want a pizza order one. It's ok to give into temptation if you know if will help in the end. One takeaway or bar of chocolate won't hurt your figure but may help you feel a little better. Obviously this isn't the answer to all your problems, but it's certainly a starting point. Just remember to get back to normal healthy eating habits the next day (if this is how you eat), healthy food does help you feel good from the inside out.

Talk, moan, rant
Your friends and family members are here to help you through difficult times, if your confidence is knocked then talk to someone. Even if you're not aware of the actual problem, talking about your emotions will help you process your current situation and it will feel like a weight has been lifted from your shoulders. The amount of times I've talked my friends ears off is unbelievable, I'm surprised some of them are still around haha. Even if it's something small like a work colleague has annoyed you, talk about it and don't allow yourself to hold grudges against silly moments. Speaking about your problems is great as you get an outsiders perspective, I always ask people to be very honest with me. In a "tell it to me straight" kind of way.

Now, I know you may not feel like dragging yourself to the gym when you're not feeling amazingly confident but exercise has been proven to release endorphins that build your happiness levels. I had a day last week where I was in a terrible mood, I'm surprised anyone wanted to be around me. Instead of lounging around the house I got up and went to a pole class, it worked wonders, I had such a positive session and my confidence grew in that moment. If you don't like gyms or don't do a sport then going for a walk works just as well, the fresh air will do you the world of good.

Outfit details

Dress: River Island
Bag: Cambridge Satchel Company
Shoes: Office

Sincerely, Kimberly.

Wednesday, 21 June 2017


Making decisions is never easy, unfortunately it's a normal part of life and has to be done. I'm very indecisive, whether it be choosing a movie, restaurant or ice cream flavour. Even deciding which of my 100 hobbies to prioritise, I always struggle with decisions. At the beginning of the year I was overloading myself with 50 tasks to complete each day, pencilling in something every second I could. Up until it caught up with me, I started having anxiety issues and had a mini breakdown. Awkward I know. I was so good up until recently, but now I'm not letting my body rest and am starting to feel both mentally and physically exhausted. It's time to cut back on my busy schedule and focus on my goals, the things that are truly important to me. This is easier said than done as everything I do I'm passionate about.

How do I make such a difficult decision, what do I prioritise?

Let's begin with prioritising my hobbies, realistically I need reduce the amount of time spent on a few or cut one out completely. One thing I know for certain, pole dancing won't be a hobby I neglect. I've worked so hard and put in so many hours of training to regain strength I lost after being off due to illness. Plus, I'm training to become an instructor so this is a valid reason for keeping pole as my number one hobby. Next, blogging, from this post you can see it's not something I want to do less of. Blogging is a great way to express my thoughts and tell people about my experiences, I find it therapeutic and don't think I would forgive myself if I attempted to stop. Acting is also important to me. I'm currently working on an awareness project, it's something that is close my heart and I believe it will make an impact. Therefore it's not the right time to move away from acting due to this project. Right, so basically I've argued with myself not to cut down on anything. This is going well, maybe I should sleep less ... that might help?

It's not only about making the bigger decisions, I also struggle with the smaller ones such as choosing a movie to watch with friends or the type of chocolate I fancy. When I'm with others I always find myself saying "I don't mind, you can choose", and this is true most of the time I'm not bothered. Although, I have been disappointed in the past with others decisions, whether it be a film that wasn't up to it's 4 star review or a restaurant that I definitely won't be visiting again anytime soon.

Making decisions can be tough at times, whether it be a big or a small one. I've been thinking about the stages of making decisions and how you should consider approaching one when it occurs.

Write a list
I often have to sit down and focus purely on the decision that needs to be made, as the American's do I get the yellow legal pad out and write down the pros and cons. Highlighting every possible outcome, I like to take a detailed approach to things as you can tell. Whether it be deciding something small, or the bigger things such as your career. I find that writing things down helps me process the information and come to a conclusion ... normally.

Ask for opinions
Working through issues yourself is great but sometimes you can't make a decision based on your opinion alone. I'm not saying base your decision on what others say but it's always good to gain an outsiders perspective. A friend can see your decision more clearly as they're not as close to it. They're able to break it down and give you an honest opinion.

It's good to know that others appreciate your decision. Next time you make a one, no matter how big or small ask for some feedback. "Did you think it was a good idea to quit my job and go travelling?" "Did you like the food?" "How was the movie?". Be independent and listen to your own voice but at the same time appreciate others experiences and advice.

Be selfish
It's great to please others and know you've done what is best for your friend or family member, although that said, it's also important to consider what you want. It's ok to be a little selfish now and again to ensure your happiness, ever heard the expression "you can't please everyone", well it's true. There will come a time when it's impossible to make a decision and please absolutely all the people involved, sometimes you have to accept that not everyone will like your choice.

Give it ago
Next time you're in a situation where no one is making a decision, possibly going out with the girls or planning a weekend getaway, try making the choice yourself. Recommend a few options and your confidence with decision making will grow.

Don't worry
I find the reason I don't want to make a decisions sometimes is because I'm afraid it's the wrong one. To be honest there are very few decisions that can't be corrected or changed so I wouldn't worry. Accept that you made a mistake and move on, there is no point dwelling on the past. Remember that you aren't selling your soul to the devil, everything is reversible in a way. You'll be able to leave that job you don't like, the city that isn't right for you or the rubbish relationship you're in. Stop stressing (as I do all the time) and enjoy making decisions.

Sincerely, Kimberly.

Thursday, 1 June 2017


I've recently discovered that journaling is pretty great, it's perfect if you're having a bad day and need to let off some stream, to document important moments in life, for tracking weight loss and fitness goals, or even to write about something positive each day. A journal has hundreds of purposes and you can make it your own. "A personal journal is an ideal environment in which to "become". It is a perfect place for you to think, feel, discover, expand, remember, and dream." - Brad Wilcox.

I've been journaling for about 6 weeks and am finding it so helpful. Although, I've quickly realised that it differs from blogging in many ways. With a hand-written journal you can't re-write an entry as easily as you can electronically. It could become very messy if you tried to erase a sentence here or there, for people like me who love things to be neat and tidy it can be difficult to deal with. In a way, this is a good thing, you get the real emotions out on the page instead of editing your story. I'm already seeing the benefits of keeping a hand-written journal, some are obvious but some I didn't really expect. I knew it would be a great way for me to express my emotions, explore my goals and work through my issues. I didn't expect to breathe a sigh of relief once I've wrote everything down. It's very therapeutic, you're able to be honest and have no fear that you will be criticised for writing something people would deem inappropriate.

I had to have the right journal, I didn't feel comfortable using a ringbinder notebook, I wanted something pretty and better quality for my constant ramblings. I looked in a few shops and found some beautiful designs but they were too expensive for my liking. Then I tried WHSmith and found this bright and bold orange journal for only £8 which was pretty reasonable, although now it's in the sale for £4 so grab a bargain while you can. Getting the right journal could motivate you to start writing, I was much more inspired once I had my new one.

One thing I would suggest if you're starting a journal is don't put additional pressure on yourself by attempting to write every day if you don't want to. Sometimes, I only write once a week and other times I'm writing twice a day. It depends what goes on in my life, if you're writing for yourself like I am then don't worry. Try and relax, enjoy writing and getting your creative juices flowing. Some days I had nothing to write about, forcing myself to write would only discourage me. I don't think "I woke up, ate a whole chocolate cake and watched tv." is worth documenting anywhere other than Twitter. In reality, a journal won't be perfectly written and have one exciting entry after another, we're only human and sometimes have what would be considered "boring problems".

You'll never know if journaling will work until you give it a try. The first thing to consider is how you're going to journal, whether you choose hand-written as I did or electronically. Next, do you want it to be public for the world to read or something private just for you. Since I already have this little space on the blogosphere to ramble publicly I wanted a personal space to express my thoughts. It was the best decision I've made recently, hopefully I've inspired just one person to start a journal of their own.

Sincerely, Kimberly.

Wednesday, 26 April 2017


Since my recent re-diagnisis of epilepsy I've been asked the same questions over and over again. Most people don't realise there is more to the condition than avoiding flashing lights and shaking on the floor. Although this can be true for some people, it's a stereotype and isn't always accurate. In fact only 1 in 20 people are sensitive to flickering lights. There are about 40 different types of epilepsy, each person has different triggers and warning signs. Every situation is unique. I wanted to write this post to explain in a little more detail about the condition and how its affected me in the past and now. Grab a cup a tea, you're in for a long read!

Childhood Epilepsy is on arise
Epilepsy isn't just a condition for adults, thousands of children are diagnosed each year. I was originally diagnosed at 8 years old and it certainly changed my life. Childhood epilepsy can certainly be difficult to deal with, not only for the ones affected but also their carers. My mum recently told me about the worst seizure I ever had (sounds like a scary story right?). Well, I was fitting for about 20 mins in total and my mum was a reck, the emergency doctor rushed to our house to help after the ambulance rang to say they were stuck in traffic, seriously! When we finally got into the ambulance the lights and sirens were on, the doctor said it was to rush through the traffic, although this was actually to keep my mum calm. When we arrived at the hospital I wasn't taken straight the children's ward, I was admitted into an emergency ward as they thought I had a few other issues. After I stopped seizing the left side of my body was paralysed, the doctors concluded that I could of had a mini stroke due to the extreme seizure. A few hours passed and I began to regain the movement in my left side, thank goodness! I can't imagine what my family and friends had to go through during this period of my life, I believe, even though I was young I still managed to throw myself a pity party as I did this time round! I really should thank my parents for everything they've done, up until recently I didn't know about these serious seizures as my mum didn't feel the need to tell me as epilepsy was a thing of the past. I guess she wanted to protect me from what happened and I'm thankful she did that.

Symptoms vary
Symptoms of epilepsy can vary from barely noticeable to very dramatic, depending on the area of the brain affected. Some people stare into space, this was a symptom I suffered from when I was younger. I would blankly stare for several minutes then carry on the conversation where I left off not realising that others had moved on by this point. My parents would humour me and repeat a conversation to avoid hurting my feelings. I got a little upset in the past as it was confusing.

Confusion is another common symptom, just after a seizure before I am aware of my surroundings I feel very confused and aren't aware of whats going on around me. I don't always recognise my family or friends, once I was convinced my boyfriend (ex now) was trying to harm me and I'm sure there are other circumstances where I've done strange things. Other people vomit, giggle uncontrollably, have difficulties breathing, loose consciousness, experience tremors or even loose bladder control (sexy I know).

Warning signs
Each person will experience different warning signs, personally I feel exhausted and have headaches before a seizure. When I was younger I would smell burnt rubber before an episode, although the recent ones haven't demonstrated this. Depending on the person, warning signs can be anything. You need to understand your body and how epilepsy affects it to figure out what these signs may be. The sooner you identify the warning signs, the better prepared you can be.

Seizures have stages
All seizures go through a 3 stage process and have a beginning, middle and end. The first stage is where you experience signs of a seizure beginning, these will be smells like how I smelt burnt rubber as a child, sounds, tastes or feel lightheaded. Stage two is the seizure itself, whether it be a partial seizure or a major one. The final stage is where the brain is recovering, this can take seconds or hours depending on the person, usual this is followed by confusion and memory loss. If a seizure lasts for more than 5 minutes, call an ambulance for help.

It's not just about seizures
Epilepsy isn't only about seizures, sometimes the condition can cause a change in behaviour and personality or lead to other neurological problems such as learning difficulties, depression or anxiety. If someone is suffering from these symptoms it should be investigated as epilepsy may not be the cause. I know that I've suffered from a few of these but can't confirm 100% that it is due to epilepsy.

Due to the nature of epilepsy certain limitations are put on your life. I believe the hardest one for me is loosing my driving license, a lot of people aren't aware that you have to be seizure free for a year before you are able to drive. Even if you're on medication, you still need to wait a year. That is a long time and it takes away a lot of your independence. I already feel the restriction of not being able to go where I want when I want. On the plus side I'll be given a free bus pass, although you can't use it before 9:30am, anyone who works for a living doesn't get the full benefits. I'm also not meant to ride a bike, for the same reasons that I could cause harm to myself or others. The doctors basically provide you with a long list of things you can't do when you're diagnosed!

Now this next one may be difficult for some people to handle, but for me I think its alright as I already gave this up in July 2016 and haven't touched it since. It sounds like I'm talking about some hardcore drugs but no these are legal narcotics, alcohol. If you drink a lot of alcohol and you're epileptic it's difficult to pull you out of a seizure as they're unable to give you the correct medication. Everyone doesn't have to go to the extreme I have and cut it out completely, but just be aware of the quantity you're drinking as it may save your life having one less drink.

Epilepsy sucks!
To tell you the truth having epilepsy sucks! This can be said about so many other medical conditions too. At the end of the day you need to own it so it doesn't take over your life. You need to learn to accept things that you cannot change. It will be difficult to begin with, but in time everything should fall into place, at least I hope it does. I'm still in my denial / anger stage of the process of accepting everything that is going on but I know I'll be fine. I beat it once and I can do it again! I've just got to be strong and realise that everything happens for a reason and try to stay positive.

Sincerely, Kimberly.

Monday, 10 April 2017


Over the last few months I've been feeling exhausted and when I say that I don't mean just a little tired. I've felt like I've needed a nap in the middle of the day to feel rested. I kept thinking it was strange that I needed all this sleep, turns out I had a medical reason behind it all. Epilepsy decided to make an appearance in my life once again, not something I wanted to deal for the second time but life has a funny way of surprising you. 

I'm not sure if you're aware but there are various types of epilepsy, people have different symptoms and triggers. For me, flashing lights aren't going to make me seize. Yes, I can drink alcohol if I want to although I choose not too. No, I don't pass out 3 times a day and start seizing on the floor. There are several types of the condition, not all of them involve having to avoid flashing lights and shaking on the floor. I wanted to write this post to explain in a little more detail about epilepsy and my experience.

I was diagnosed with epilepsy when I was about 8, I suffered with seizures and had to take a lot of time off school. Up until a few weeks ago I was in the clear for about 7 years and hadn't been on any medication. Over the last 2 weeks I've had 2 seizures and ended up in A&E on both occasions. After years of being in good health, it's strange to loose control of my own body, to feel like at any moment I could collapse again. Luckily, the times it has happened I've been around friendly and thoughtful strangers who have helped me. They were nice enough to call an ambulance and ensure I got the help I needed.

Since I've had a few seizures within the last 2 weeks the hospital ran some tests and confirmed one of my worse fears, that my epilepsy had returned. All the limitations I will have on my life went running through my mind. I feel like I've had a lot of my independence taken away, my ability to drive is the hardest thing I have to loose, I can't drive until I've been seizure free for an entire year. At first I thought "oh I can't drive, but I'll take up bike riding". Apparently, I didn't think this one through and the doctor said it isn't possible either as I could still put myself and others in danger. I also can't swim, take a bath or travel long distances without supervision for a while. For some people these things don't matter, but for me it's a pretty big deal. Especially when I'm used to having the freedom to do what I want, when I want. 

It looks like my condition has evolved and changed since I was a child. Before, I knew my seizures would only happen while I was asleep, now I'm collapsing in the middle of the street at random points of the day. I believe I'm now much more at risk, especially since I don't have my mother by my side as I did when I was younger. I feel disappointed and let down by my mind and body, although I won't let my condition define me. I've got to stay positive and look on the bright side, at least I'm not experiencing seizures everyday like other people. I'll still be able to live a normal life, go to work, travel and do things I love. Yes, sometimes I'll need to rest and take extra care of myself but everything will fall into place eventually. The next step in getting back to normal and ensuring I have the correct medication prescribed. I should be receiving a phone call from the hospital to discuss this later in the week. It may take a few tries to get the dosage right but I'm feeling positive that it won't take long. After this is sorted, it will hopefully prevent any further seizures from occurring.

The recent issues in my health have given me the chance to step back and look at what I can do to help others in my situation as it can be a very scary experience, especially if you don't know what is happening. To help others in my situation my sister Charlotte, my friend Jess and I are taking part in Tough Mudder 2017 and are using this as the perfect opportunity to fundraise for the Epilepsy Society. This charity is the UK's leading provider of epilepsy services, working on new research to understand the condition further, heading up awareness campaigns and providing expert care for those affected. Doesn't that sound like a great cause to support? Well, you can contribute to this cause by sponsoring us via our Just Giving Page. Any donations will be greatly appreciated and go towards helping thousands of people who deal with this condition every day. 

Sincerely, Kimberly.